Tyler Garns

The Green Lantern.  I could hardly stay awake.  I’m still not sure if it’s because the movie wasn’t great or because I chronically fall asleep if I’m not working on solving a problem.  Either way, there was something that bothered me about the movie.

The Green Lanterns are supposed to not feel fear.  Instead, they exert their will.  Fear is what Parallax (the antagonist in the story) feeds off of.

The problem is, that’s not the way it really works.  We all have fear.  Fear is what keeps us from doing stupid things.  Exerting our will has nothing to do with fear.

In fact, I believe courage is the ability to address our fear head-on and still exert our will.

What do you think?

About 18 months ago I sat bawling in my car as I listened to this song for the first time.

Steven Curtis Chapman inadvertently wrote the words of my heart. I had no idea how badly I would long to have a baby girl until that option was taken away from us with Jill’s hysterectomy. I was totally happy with three boys. Boys are easy. Girls are whiney, catty, & sassy. Now, all I want is a sassy little baby girl.

Heaven is the face of a little girl with dark brown eyes that disappear when she smiles.
Heaven is the place where she calls my name and says “Daddy please, come play with me for a while”.

I don’t have any clue why it was part of God’s plan to have us find our daughter through adoption, but I have to assume it is His plan. It’s too painful to think otherwise.

God, I know it’s all of this and so much more.
But God, you know, that this is what I’m aching for.
God, you know I just can’t see beyond the door.

To top it off, a couple of months ago we almost brought a foster baby into our home. We spent a lot of time with her and the outlook for adoption was good.  Jill and I wanted to take the next step so badly.  Yet, for some reason, after much prayer, it didn’t feel right.  What do you do when you want to do something good but doesn’t feel good.  It’s a strange situation to be in.  So, it just stings a bit sometimes. What I really want is just to hold her and know she’s ours; whoever she is.

So, right now heaven is the sound of her breathing deep, lying on my chest falling fast asleep while I sing.
And heaven is the weight of her in my arms; being there to keep her safe from harm while she dreams.

Please help us on our search for our baby girl. We don’t know where she is but we’re searching for her just as any parent would search for a lost child. Please help her come home. Share this link. Tell friends and family. Your help is greatly appreciated.

Heaven is a sweet maple syrup kiss and a thousand other little things I miss with her gone.
And heaven is the place where she takes my hand and leads me to You and we both run into Your arms.

Heaven is the face of my little girl. I hope I can see her soon.

Ok, I’ll admit it.  I recently watched the first couple of episodes of X Factor with my wife.  Bless her heart.  She loves that stuff.  Generally, I think TV is a waste of time.  But, I was inspired in unexpected ways by what I saw.  When an exceptional story emerges from the masses of hopefuls, the X Factor crew (just like American Idol), dives a little deeper to tell the back story of an individual artist.

The story of Stacy Francis was heart wrenching.  As a 40 year old woman, she’s been beaten down by the world around her.  No one has believed in her.  An ex-boyfriend told her she wasn’t good enough and she was too old.  Friends and family members encouraged her to give up her dream and move on.  The time had passed.

But somehow Stacy garnered the courage to put it all on the line.  As she stepped on the stage, Simon asked her “Why do you think this hasn’t worked out?”  She mentioned a bit about her story and then exclaimed: “I don’t want to die with this music in me”.

Tears.  Not hers.  Mine.

Her statement was overwhelming to me.  The music inside her was too powerful for her to go to the grave without her getting it out.  She KNEW this was her purpose in life.  To share that beautiful power.

And her voice?  Stunning!  She clearly had music in her that should never die unheard.  It was powerful and moving.  She had faced all her fears, all her doubters, all her anxieties, all of the world.  And she won.  I haven’t watched any episodes since then. I have no idea how far she has gone or will go with her music.  But, in my mind, she won.  She won at life.  She got out the one thing she had to get out before she dies.  And it touched me in a deep way.  Thank you Stacy!

So, my question to you is: “What is inside of you that you have to get out before you die?”

Are you willing to face your deepest fears to get it out?  Are you willing to face all of your doubters?  Are you willing to face hell itself?

If so, post it below.  Let’s get it out.  Let’s make it real.

Finally the state of Arizona has deemed us fit to be parents.  Funny how no one checked to see if we were fit to be parents before we had any of our first 3 kids.  But, we’re excited the state has certified us to adopt.  Our adoption profile is live online.

Visit our adoption profile.

Please help us find our baby girl.  If you know anyone who is in a position to place a baby for adoption, please direct them to our profile.

Thank you.

I’ve often heard people say things like “Focus on your strengths” or “Don’t waste time trying to overcome your weaknesses, you’ll just burn out.”

It’s important to tease out what that means. Misinterpreted, those statements could cause some to believe that self improvement is not worthwhile.

If “strengths” & “weaknesses” are viewed as behavioral traits, and “talent” is viewed as innate ability, then things get more clear.

In our careers, we can each achieve greatness much more rapidly if we focus on the areas in which we have “talent”. Trying to develop new talent can often be frustrating & unproductive. Even when the new talent can be developed, it is often at a large cost. For example, it wouldn’t be wise for a non-technical , sales minded person to try to become a great computer programmer.

This is distinct from behavioral traits. A “strength” might be the ability to overcome procrastination. A “weakness” might be a propensity to anger. Overcoming behavioral weaknesses and developing behavioral strengths are things that each of us should be dedicating time an effort to.

When we develop our innate talents and refine our behavioral tendencies, we set ourselves up for success.

We always hear people say “If I only had more time in the day…” or “There just isn’t enough time to…”.

I’m working on a theory that says we’re all wrong about time.  My current hypothesis is that time is a limitless resource.  Despite what most people think, we actually can have all the time we need to get whatever things done we want to get done.

Let’s explore…

How is it that God can hear and answer everyone’s prayers?  There’s no way there’s enough time to do all of that.  Especially if one day in God’s time is equivalent to 1,000 years on earth.  The answer is only that God has an abundance of time.   There is no limit for him.  The scriptures refer to eternity having no beginning and no end.  If there is no beginning and no end, then there is a limitless supply.

If that is true, then how do we access this limitless supply of time?

I believe the parable of the talents applies here.  As we are good stewards of the time we’ve been given, more is given.

Think of the successful people you know.  They all seem to accomplish enormous amounts of things in less time than seems possible.  They have been given more time.

Try it out.  Decide to be the best steward of your time and watch how suddenly you have more of it.  This requires preparation, planning, and discipline.  But, it’s well worth it.

I’ve always loved reading, studying, and learning new things.  Being in Infusionsoft’s learning-rich environment has feuled the desire to read & learn more.  Below is a list of the books I read in 2010.

I started off the year strong and then slowed my reading down to only a few books in Q4.  In the end, 2010 was about getting more attuned to what it will take to get Infusionsoft to the next level, personal growth for me in various areas, and coming to grips with what I don’t know.

• The Imperial Cruise - James Bradley  – fascinating history that would probably shock most US Citizens
• Secret Societies – David V. Barrett – super interesting stuff
• The Prince & Other Writings – Niccoló Machiavelli – my attempt to get in some of “the Classics”
• Greatness: Reagan, Churchill, & The Making of Extraordinary Leaders – Steven F. Harward
• The Power of Positive Thinking – Norman Vincent Peale – a classic book on the power of our thoughts, a must read for anyone
• The 22 Immutable Laws of Branding – Al Ries – this is a must read for anyone trying to build a brand
• The Art of Learning – Josh Waitzkin – one of the most fascinating books on learning by a master of learning
• No Man’s Land – Doug Tatum – great book for people trying to take a growing business to the next level
• The Dip – Seth Godin – class Seth
• The Choice – Eliyahu M. Goldratt – some gold nuggets hidden beneath a bunch of weird stuff
• Waiting For Your Cat To Bark? – Bryan & Jeffrey Eisenberg – perfect the experience
• Groundswell – Charlene Li & Josh Bernoff – social media fact book, can be helpful in developing a social media attack stragey
• Behind The Cloud – Marc Benioff – great read, actually a must read, for any SaaS company
• Linchpin – Seth Godin – create art, everyday
• The Richest Man In Babylon - George S. Clason – always a good read and reminder of good financial practices
• The Measure of a Man – Sydney Poitier – I love learning the “story” behind people
• The Think Big Manifesto – Michael Port – read the headlines, skip the fluff.
• How Did That Happen? – Roger Conners & Tom Smith
• Conquer The Chaos – Clate Mask & Scott Martineau – great read for entrepreneurs
• Word of Mouth Marketing – Andy Sernovitz
• Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion – Cialdini – the best book ever written for people trying to influence (sales & marketing people)
• For Entrepreneurs Only – Wilson Harrell – required reading for understanding entrepreneurs
• Mojo – How to Get It, How to Keep It, How to Get It Back If You Lost It – Marshall Goodsmith
• How to Win Friends and Influence People – Dale Carnegie
• Big Brands, Big Trouble – Jack Trout – fascinating analysis of why big brands fail
• Warlord – Ted Bell – Alex Hawke is more believable than James Bond (and could whip him in a fight)

In 2011 I’m reading a bunch of real-life adventure books (people who’ve climbed Everest, people surviving in the jungle) including one of my favorite topics: sailing in heavy weather.  I’m also reading some books on speed reading (something I started reading last year but wasn’t fast enough to finish by the end of the year), how to be a better executive, some classic marketing stuff, more sea survival books, and some books on slowing down and being deliberate.

I read 26 books in 2010.  Roughly one book every two weeks.  In 2011 I want to double that.  One book per week.  Minimum.  I’ll keep you posted.

It would seem that most people would agree on general issues of right and wrong. But, in many cases, integrity seems to be an entirely subjective thing.

Last week I was presented with an opportunity to make a judgement call on an issue where integrity was being called into question. You can read the details of the situation on the Infusionsoft Blog. We held a contest and one of the contestants had done something that was not explicitly stated as wrong in the rules but was not within the intent of the contest. I was surprised at the debate that ensued. Both sides were right. Yet they were in direct opposition to each other. How could that be?

As I thought through this situation, I was reminded of the quandary in which Adam and Eve had found themselves in the Garden of Eden. God had commanded them to “multiply and replenish the earth”. But He had also commanded them to not partake of the forbidden fruit. They couldn’t follow the first commandment without breaking the second. They were stuck.

I find it interesting that one of the very first lessons taught to mankind was the lesson of discernment. Adam and Eve had to make a judgement call and do what was most right.

How often do we find ourselves in similar situations, needing to apply wisdom to choose between right and more right? And how often do we find ourselves defending a right decision out of “pride” or “integrity” only to ignore a more right option?

A few weeks ago I posted my personal internal commitment. The reason was to publicly declare how I am committing to living my life – not because I want everyone to read it – but only to hold myself to a higher level of accountability. Jill was concerned that people reading it wouldn’t fully understand. I told her I wasn’t concerned about that because I wrote it for me and for no one else.

So, now that I’ve been living my commitment for a few weeks, what are the results?

Each morning during my personal reflection & meditation time I read scriptures, pray, and read my personal internal commitment statement. I also work on committing it to memory. By doing this, my commitment is more present in my mind throughout the day and I’m more likely to be intentional about each activity I participate in.

I’m more focused at work.

I’m more engaged with my wife & kids.

I intentionally have more fun with them.

I’m more focused when participating in my church responsibilities.

In the end, I don’t think the observable change is great enough for anyone to take notice. If you asked my wife, she would probably say she hasn’t seen a huge difference. But I am noticing the difference. The change is welling up inside me and the magnitude is growing each day.

Now, the key is to live my commitment with 100% consistency.

This is my personal internal commitment.  It comes from a place of pure humility and understanding that everything I am and everything I have was given to me by God.  I am committed to living my life according to who I am.  My commitment was inspired by the Deuce Lutui TBOLITNFL story.

I am a son of God.  I recognize that nobility within me and the responsibility that comes with it.  I have a desire and propensity to do what is right – as evidenced by my choosing God’s plan in the preexistence and on earth.  I want to serve God in all that I do and dedicate my life to building His kingdom.  I have unwavering faith and I look to my Heavenly Father for guidance in all I do.

I am a loving father and husband.  I enjoy spending time with my family, encouraging and uplifting them.  All that I do in life is with the purpose of providing for, teaching, and showing an example to my family.

I am an inspired problem solver.  My quick, keen, and alert mind was given to me, in part, to figure out how to take Infusionsoft to $50MM.  I have a powerful ability to put into operation the ideas conceived in my mind.  I have the ability to consolidate complex ideas and package and represent them well.  My mind is always curious and inquisitive and I’m continually searching for a better understanding of human nature.

I am an independent, free-thinker, who makes accurate decisions based on the continual mental recording of information through observations, experiences, reading, and listening.

I work in a rocket launch style with intense energy, competitive spirit, and an ambitious desire to win.  I am a locomotive-like force that is inner-directed, self-initiated, steady, steadfast, and tenacious.

I have a warm smile and a firm handshake. I have a friendly, empathetic, and persuasive way of dealing with others.  I exhibit self confidence and independence and I desire to engender those traits in others.  I am a pleasant and calm person, never letting stresses or worries cause me to flail or waiver in my convictions.  I am tolerant, helpful, and I seek to create peaceful, friendly, and orderly environments for people.  I am skillful in teaching, motivating, and developing others.  I am influential and convincing.  I am always positive, optimistic, and inspiring.

I have a burning desire to live with perfect obedience.

I am a Garns.  With that comes a legacy of untiring hard work and righteousness.  I will uphold that legacy throughout mortality.  I will be true to myself in all that I do.